As I embark on my last week in my 20's, I can't help but reflect back on what a dynamic decade it was. When I turned 20, I was in my sophomore year of college at UTC, living on Thrasher Pike & had just gotten out of a relationship which left me feeling completely lost and lonely in my new life out of high school in a new place. I soon made some friends at UTC through some classes and reconnected with some high school friends who had made their way to the big city as well. I was accepted into PT school the fall of my junior year and finally my life plan was starting. All my hard work, volunteering and studying had paid off. I made my way through hell, I mean PT school, finding sweet friends along the way and several frogs, as the saying goes you have to "kiss a few frogs to find your prince," I graduated, found a job and then adulthood. Still something in my life was missing. After experiencing the true "college" experience for 5 years, putting myself first, I began to realize God was not where He should be in my life. The many distractions of life like studying, friends, boys, money, clothes, and nights out can really push Him into last place. I knew I needed to put Him first and trust Him more with my life. At age 25, that's what I finally did, little by little. It wasn't all at once by any means. He knew I was a work in progress.
At a friend's wedding in April 2010, this handsome preacher's kid that I was thought I was to "wild" for, got my attention. I had known him since about 6th grade, when I met him at Bible Camp. He had been trying to date me for years, yet I just thought I was not good enough for him and that we were to different. But I decided to ask him to the movies just by chance. My bestest friend who knows me better than myself sometimes, Jenny, put the idea in my head. (I owe you big). What I thought would be an awkward silence date that evening, was the best first date ever. Maybe we weren't so different. The dates continued and my confidence in God's plan for me with the right man, a man of my same faith, also grew. By searching for God, I found Mr. Right. How cliche, right? Just amazing. Even despite the 5 months of long distance during football season we endured, we made it through.
On December 22nd, 2010-- Caleb popped the question and that following summer at age 26, we were married. At that point, life could not have gotten any better. We were soon able to buy our first home that winter and get our sweet Manning the next spring. Again, life was grand. Then along came Dolly. Life was more grand. Having a baby was originally our "5 year plan" because I was not trusting enough in God that we could afford or have the support we needed to care for a baby before then. No one is perfect all the time and I admit, I should have never doubted it at all. I eventually let my guard down and just put it in His hands. If we were supposed to have a baby before being married 5 years, then God would time it to be so. Well, He did. On May 3rd, 2014 our lives got unbelievably better with our sweet Wylie Jewell. The first month of her life was not easy, but without faith in Him and how He had already guided my life and took care of me, I would have never made it. I had been so worried about finding a nanny for her since we live 45+ minutes from all family. No worries, He sent me 2 sweet angels that care for my girl every week so she can nap in her own crib and not be around germs. I thank Him every cold morning when I leave that I don't have to get her out in the weather. I took another leap of faith in changing jobs when Wylie was 4 months old so I would have more time and flexibility with her before she got all grown up. I had never been more scared in my life, but He held my hand and got me through it. Now, I am blessed with the greatest gift of more time with my Wylie. Every morning and afternoon I get with her just fills my heart with joy and restores my walk. Restores the fact that I will never ever stray from the Almighty and His awesome plan for my life ever again. Being His servant here on this earth by caring for those in need and my daughter is the greatest job I could ever ask for.
I enter my 30's with great hopes for even more blessings in His plan for our lives and without a shadow of a doubt know that He will always provide a way. His way is always better than mine. You can see that by just bisecting my 20's in half. The first half without Him I was "okay" but it was all my way, not His. The second half was His way that I finally allowed and it was simply amazing. You can ask anyone what a big stress ball I used to be, even in high school. While I still have OCD tendencies and a timely ordered plan, it's a lot easier for me these days to just let it roll and put my faith in something higher than me. Higher than this world. Higher than evil. Higher than our government. Higher than disease. Higher than finances. Higher than daily struggles and frustrations. My heart is content. His ways are just. The song by Carrie Underwood speaks volumes, "Jesus take the wheel." I couldn't have done all this on my own. At least not as gracefully.
While I am in disbelief that I will soon be 30, I can happily leave my 20's behind and be grateful for each and every experience, example, shortcoming, person and blessing. God may have every year of my 30's. I can't wait to see what He will do with this decade.
Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. Proverbs 16:3
Amen.
